Tuesday, January 31, 2012


Right now I feel like I say too much and too little at once. The things that eat at me aren't my things to talk about or share, but they hurt anyway. And when something slips out I immediately feel like I've said too much. Like saying anything is a betrayal.

This isn't even about one thing. This is about when I talk about any of the things in my life that involve other people. Everything. What else is life? And yet I'm not a naturally private person I don't think. When I'm upset, or thinking, or processing I like to talk it out with friends. And yet often by talking I say too much about things that are not mine to tell. And even when I manage to hold back I feel guilty about wanting to talk. And when I talk around a subject or take a stand without being able to explain why I feel like I'm just being an argumentative bitch for no reason.

Anyway. None of this makes sense. I'm not really saying anything clearly. But as soon as I post it I'll feel like I've said too much. As usual, again.

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Home Design

I'm not Martha Stewart. I know that may be confusing for most people, but despite the similarities (female? That's kind of it.) I am not her. And therefore I do not have her talent for all the various types of home making that exist.

In other words, I need help.  At the risk of outing myself and ruining my half-assed attempt at anonymity, below are a couple room designs. If anyone feels so inclined, I'd love an opinion. I'm trying to re-organize my brand new (1 bedroom! Spacious!) apartment after having been crammed into a studio for years, and I've come to realize it is not a natural talent of mine.  Here's what my apartment looks like now:

The gray rectangle is the radiator, and therefore not movable. The brown rectangles are half-shelves.
Not exactly a wonder of layout. Especially since the only plug is behind my table (which is hanging off the room b/c in actuality the side folds down. The layout program did not have a half-circle table.).  Therefore there is a whole mess of cords stretching across the doorway from the table to the tv.

This might be more accurate:

Here are a couple ideas I have to improve the situation:

Option 1

Option 2

I've put this up on Facebook for a friend vote (which is why I'm a little worried about blowing my cover) but I wanted to see if any budding design stars out there had any ideas or opinions as well.  So. What do you think?